Monday, May 24, 2010

I'm a bad blogger...

I know, I know... I haven't posted anything in one month. That is just ridiculous, isn't it? Well, let's see... a lot has happened since then. Our paperwork for Mia's citizenship was approved by USCIS on May 5, was forwarded on to the National Visa Center, where they approved a visa for her upon our return from China. That approval was "cabled" to our US Consulate in Guangzhou, China last week. Now, we are on the second to last wait for what is referred to as an "Article 5". This is simply a statement to the CCAA (Chinese Center for Adoption Affairs) that Mia will be granted citizenship once she arrives to the US AND she will be issued a valid passport as we leave China headed home. Once the Article 5 is issued we wait on the Travel Approval or TA.

Garrett had a birthday on May 10. My boy turned ten years old. He is such a sweet little soul and I cannot believe he is already ten. Wow... His favorite, favorite, favorite place to eat is STEVIE B's. So, we had his birthday celebration there. He loved getting to eat all the pizza he wanted, plus arcade games, plus presents. This is the perfect combination if you ask Garrett.

Nolan finished up Tball on Saturday night. We've had a fun season and he has played so well. He is a good little ball player and I am looking forward to many more baseball seasons. I love hanging out at a ballpark on warm spring nights. So fun!!!

This past weekend we had two baby showers for Mia. I'll have to put a separate post for that. We are so fortunate to have wonderful, supportive family and friends who are ecstatic about this little girl. She has no idea that an enormous network of people are praying for her and are so looking forward to meeting her. How could she know? She only knows the orphanage in which she lives, even though it seems to do the very best it can to care for her. She doesn't know the love of a mother or a father, or the sweet affection from siblings. I sometimes watch my boys horseplaying and listen to them giggle and laugh with one another and sometimes I feel like my heart might just burst for loving them all so much. I am counting the days until I can watch them love on her.

I realize that this is the calmest my life will be for a very long time right now... today. I have no idea what lies ahead for us. There are so many unknowns about our daughter and how she will adapt to a new life, a new family, a new home. This waiting has been very hard and continues to be my biggest challenge of getting through each day. I am accustomed to being busy; I already have three kids. But the constant longing for someone, the constant worry that she's away from us, the constant preoccupation with counting days is beginning to take a toll on my sanity. She is the first thing on my mind when I wake up and she is the last thought I have as I drift off to sleep. I know that we are getting closer everyday and we will be boarding a plane before I know it, but for right now, it seems like it won't ever become a reality. I liken this situation to when you are 8 1/2 months pregnant, and the Braxton-Hicks contractions start and you head to the hospital thinking you're in labor and the doctor informs you it's false labor... "But don't worry... go home and rest and I'll see you next week." It's that kind of frustrating, irrational grief that you feel for something you want so much. You just want the pain to be over. It's the same feeling, folks. But, even now, I know that these next few weeks are going to click on by and she'll be with us in not very long. Oh, how I long for that day.

So, there you have it. I accept that I am a terrible excuse for a blogger. I apologize for disappointing all my peeps who log on to see what's new. Thank you for caring. That means a lot to me. Hopefully I'm going to have a lot to blog about in the next few weeks. Until then... let's keep praying for Mia and a fast TA.

Much love,